As we move through life it’s tempting to compare ourselves to those around us, our family and friends, and the people whose lives we see online. This may act as inspiration or motivation, but it can also drag us down and make us feel bad. It’s time to focus on yourself, not others.
Today I wanted to share with you some ways that you can focus on yourself, not others. The goal is to make progress with our own lives and what we want to achieve — and not get stuck watching other people while our goals and desires pass us by.
Why you should focus on yourself, not others
Comparing yourself to other people gets exhausting really fast and can lead to burnout. There’s always someone out the with the perfect home, car, family, manicure, wardrobe, business, or whatever it is that we covet. It’s fine to watch others to help you build a picture of what you’d like to strive for. After that, it’s time to stop, take a step back, and focus on ourselves.
By focusing in on yourself you can enjoy things like:
- Time to chase your own goals and wishes
- Greater awareness of your own needs and how to take care of them
- Present and healthy relationships with loved ones
- Time to focus on your mental health and emotional wellbeing
- Healthy boundaries and the chance to say no
- Opportunities for self discovery
- More free time to spend doing whatever you enjoy the most
It’s always good to think of what you want and need, then take steps to get there. Forget about other people — while they can be there to support you, the person that needs to make the commitment and go through the journey is you. It’s time to find positive, motivating, and achievable ways to focus on yourself, not others.
12 ways to focus on yourself instead of other people
Ready to jump in and make this the year you prioritize your own wants and needs? Here are some of the best ways to focus on yourself, not others.
1. Set boundaries
It’s time to start saying no to people, things, and obligations that you don’t want. You don’t need to attend that dinner, or give up your time or resources for something that doesn’t fill you with joy. Find your inner self confidence, set healthy boundaries, and respect them.
2. Make time for self care
Many of us don’t spend enough time on ourselves. It’s time to change that. Make space in your days, weeks, and months for self care. Mix things up with physical activity, self care for your mind, and things you love to do. Take a look at my list of self care ideas for tons of ways you can get started.
3. Set goals and strive to achieve them
It’s hard to stay focused when you don’t know what you’re aiming for. Set some of your own goals and then do your best to make progress towards them. Aim for a goal that’s challenging, but not so much so that you’re put off doing anything about it. Count every step you take as one towards becoming the successful person that I know you can be.
4. Be honest with yourself and others
Much of what we see online is sugar coated. Take this as a cue to buck the trend and opt for honesty and transparency in what you say, do, and create. This honesty will feel refreshing, and help you make better decisions, closer friendships, and healthier boundaries.
5. Create routines
It’s easy to feel lost without a routine to guide you through the day. Create routines that help you stay on top of your good habits and push those bad ones away. I find it helpful to have a morning cleaning routine, and a monthly reset routine can be a great way to kickstart a new month.
6. Try a new hobby
There’s nothing quite like a new hobby or interest to light you up. Look for a new relaxing hobby to try, or go for something more active and adventurous — like rock climbing or canoeing. Jump into your new hobby, immerse yourself in it, and find yourself.
7. Read affirmations
Often what’s holding us back from achieving our goals is negative self talk and low self esteem. Push these negative thoughts aside by reading positive affirmations to turn that inner voice into your happy co-pilot through life. You can find affirmations for almost everything — self worth, self confidence, self love, self compassion, and more. Take a look at my collection of affirmations for inspiration, or download and print my affirmation cards for an in-person reminder of why you’re great.
8. Write in your journal
It’s not until we write everything down that we realize just how much we’ve achieved and what we’ve overcome. Start or rekindle a journaling habit and make writing in your journal part of your morning or evening routine. Use this time to reflect, celebrate, and practice gratitude.
9. Embrace the simple pleasures in life
Social media can get really distracting, and often what helps most is to take a break from it. Step away from your desk, head outside, and just breathe. Find little moments in which you can appreciate the simple pleasures in life, and watch it change how you feel about all the comparison and fear of missing out.
10. Plan your meals
It’s super tempting to hop online and order takeout when you’re lost in an endless social media scroll, or so busy worrying about other people that you forget to cook. Prioritize yourself and enjoying delicious, nutritious food, by planning (and/or prepping) your meals in advance.
11. Make time for personal growth
As you’re sat watching other people find success, you’re losing time that you could spend making your own goals happen. Make self improvement, personal growth, and career development part of your life in a big way. Not only does this give you something to focus on, but your hard work now can unlock future opportunities.
12. Try a self care day
Focusing on yourself is a habit that builds up over time, but you can find shortcuts to success. One of those is by planning and enjoying a self care day. Think of it as a break from your everyday life, where you can focus on your own needs, wants, and goals — completely undisturbed. Use this time to reflect, relax, and come back to your to-do list with a fresh point of view.
Grow by focusing on yourself this year
Focusing on yourself instead of others can really change your life. Instead of getting lost in comparisons and feeling bad about your progress, you can go out there and live life to its fullest. Be inspired to set goals and chase them, set boundaries and keep them, and create moments of rest, relaxation, and joy. Most of all, remember to focus on yourself, not others.
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